Pregnancy... Its a weird thing

So pregnancy it does crazy things to you . I must admit I should be writing a book about the kinda things I do because it would be  a best seller but I thought I would share with you my latest thoughts they went like this:
MmMmMmmMMM I really want Mac and Cheese and a bowl of cereal.... at the same time! TOGETHER! No, that would be crazy they need to be in seperate bowls but you can use the same spoon and the same mouth at the same time yeah yeah yeah.. because you don't want the noodles to get soggy.... wait you boil noodles in water SO TOGETHER TOGETHER IN THE SAME BOWL.... NO! What were you thinking?  I just want Mac and Cheese on top of a pizza .. yep. So we get a pizza... and then I decide that Mac and Cheese IS DISGUSTING WORST THING EVER I can't even think about it. How dare you even mention such a disgusting food in my presence and its orange gross get it away from me now.
MmmMMMmmmm I really want Honey Chipotle Chicken ooo I want it so bad I can't live without it I must go get it now .. oh look a CUPCAKE !!!
Or the third and final thing....
My dear husband is escorting me to my vehicle and he shuts the door for me but in doing so he accidentally shuts my foot in the door and I start crying! WAILING ... Did he hurt my foot ? he asks? No! I am crying because I dropped the eggs and they DID NOT BREAK... They did not break but I am still crying because I dropped them ( Why I am carrying eggs is trivial and does not matter to the point of the story)
THE END

Oh Mushu.

He is a very popular guy among us roomies. Mushu has dated Dishtowl, had a fling with Zombie and crushed on Lunchpale and Spooner. He was a busy boy. We first met him through a common friend of ours, Mike. Mike was letting Mushu hang out on his balcony until Mushu had a more permanent residence. Mike left on his mission and Mushu still did not have a place to call his own. Mushu thought Dishtowl and Twoderful were pretty cool so he moved over to their balcony to hang out. The cops caught wind of this and asked Dishtowl and Twoderful to stop letting Mushu hang out. Dishtowl and Twoderful did not want to be thrown in the slammer so they agreed. Mushu was crushed. Dishtowl and Twoderful had a soft spot for him and let him hide in the closet on their balcony. Eventually Dishtowl and Twoderful moved caves. Mushu, lovestruck with Dishtowl, followed like a lost puppy. Mushu hid in the balcony closet at the new cave and his romance with Dishtowl kinda blosomed and but then died very quickly. He still stayed in the closet living like a hermit. Then Dishtowl and Twoderful moved again and Lunchpale, and Spooner met Mushu. Zombie got reacquainted. (She had known him from previous encounters.) Yet again Mushu found his place in the closet and him and Zombie occasionally cuddled and ogled each other. Then as fate would have it the roomies of apt 30 had need for Mushu and his manly muscles to get a toilet up on a roof. He had an accident and 'accidentally' fell off the roof with the toilet. There was much sorrow. Mushu then recooperated for months away from the wild and willy ways of the women he was so fond of. Eventually Mike came home from his mission. He looked up his old buddy Mushu. A few months after Mike had been home he decided to have a Special Party called PJL Day. Mushu was invited. Those who came partied hard!!!! It was fantastic and fun!!! Sadly, it was Mushu's last hurrah. He has passed on now. Gone to a better life. No one knows the cause of death. Investigators suspect it is too high an exposure to toilets. This is all that remains.

Attractive right?

*Disclaimer* 

Mushu is in fact a mannequin. Not a real man.

-twoderful

Dinner!!!!!!!

Okay...I've been saving up tasty morsels of life so that I may share with all of you!!! And I've been waiting till the biggest and tastiest morsel was ready for devouring!!!! I hope you are all ready for this because it is going to be epic!!! I'm going to try and build the momentum so the least tastiest first..... yet still yummy!!!!!

Appetizer:

Where I work I see lots of names.... and some of them are hilarious!!! OK. Here are names of note as of late:

1. Chewbaca (First name for a little girl mind you. No joke. As in the Yeti off of Star Wars.)
2. Gabby Goo (First and Last name for a girl.)
3. Fierce (First name for a boy.)
4. Terror (First name for a boy. Again. No joke.)
5. Mrs. Pennifile (For a teacher. Rhymes with pedophile, no?)

First Course:

When I went to the temple with a friend of mine we were just chatting as we walked up to the main doors. Then her head turned to look diagonally behind us and mine followed. There was this guy holding a Pikachu and he was dressed as Ash Ketchum. Red hat plus vest. Then he went down on one knee. P.S he was talking to a girl and holding her hand the whole time he was dressed like that. Yep. I felt super legit that Ash purposed at the temple and I saw it!!!

Second Course:

While at work there were these two girls who were writing instructions to do different things and because I'd never done this particular task they used me as a trial run to see if I could understand and complete it using their written instructions. So girl A is my test subject and girl B is simply an onlooker. This particular task deals with High School Senior pictures. We have the option to take personalized photos. As in if you are in to sports bring a basketball or if your into music you'd bring your instrument. So. I asked her what she would be wearing for that picture and she says “I'm going to be wearing my wrestling onesie.” Oh. My. Good. Ness. I lost it. I was busting up so badly!!! (P.S Wrestling, the sport mind you, does not happen in onesies.) So, when I had the ability to speak again I asked what props 'he' would have. She answered with, “Yeah, I'll have my wrestling shoes and wrestling earmuffs.” My cheeks hurt so badly from laughing so hard!!!! P.P.S Wrestling also does not happen wearing earmuffs.

Third Course:

I went to an MTC reunion thing of a friend of mine. I brought a couple friends of mine who had been called to his mission and he thought it'd be great for them to be exposed to several who served in that mission. So we came and we saw. It was fantastic! There were 9 missionaries who came and they were all breaking off into broken English mixed with their language. The parts I understood were hilarious!!! There were these two sister missionaries who were companions in the MTC. (P.S MTC is the Missionary Training Center where LDS missionaries go before they actually depart on their missions to receive extra training.) One of the stories they told went like this. Sister A had to leave the room to go get something or other and Sister B had just heated up a microwave pizza. A bunch of sisters had been walking by when they asked her if she wanted to pray with them. So she said yes because saying no was sorta not an option. “Nope I've decided that praying is not for me. You go ahead.” You see the problem. Her pizza had beeped just before they had asked her so she was holding her very warm pizza in her hands. Then they all knelt in a circle as she is holding out this pizza in her hands. Her companion comes back and sees this random group of sisters kneeling with her companion as her companion is holding out this pizza in the middle of the circle. When they were done Sister A says to Sister B “Sister B I was gone for eleven seconds and I come back and your praying to a Pizza!!!!” Can I get an LOL!!! (Laugh out Loud. NOT Lots of Love.)

Dessert:

So I've told some if not all of you about my project I've been working on. So here is the final product. 

-twoderful

Fun fact for ya!

So it is nearing the end of the year and I figured I would share some happy facts!! They made me happy anyways.

Our audience reaches as far as Germany, Russia, Netherlands, South Korea, the UK, Denmark, Canada and Ukraine. The majority of our readers are from the US.

The month with the most page views was February of 2011 complete with 327.

The top five posts to receive the most views are:
1. Shh... Dont tell. -Lunchpale
2. What's that you say?  - Zombie
3. 50 Years from now.   - Zombie
4. Happy BIRTHday  - Dishtowl
5. Comments  - Lunchpale

The top two sources that bring in readers:
Google and a super cool blog.

Enjoy facts.

-twoderful.

Happy BIRTHday!

ATTENTION ROOMIES! THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT MESSAGE! 
YOU WILL WANT TO READ IT!

A while ago I was having a conversation with a roommate. I was so giddy with the whole conversation, I was about to burst. So you can all experience the giddy-ness of this conversation, I would like you to do the following:

1) Pretend your Birthday is June 18

2) Pretend like you are actually having a conversation with me.

3) Uh...read the blog post. duh! tee hee.

Me: "Is your Birthday June 19?"

Roommate: "Nope."

Me: "Bummer! I always seem to get it wrong...Is it on the 18th?"

Roommate: "Bingo!"

Me: "Well sweet! I have super cool news for you!!!"

Roommate: "Well then tell me!!"

Me: "Oh, ok. I have the BEST Birthday present for you EVER!"

Roommate: "Why don't you just give it to me for Christmas?"

Me: "Well...I thought about that, but it's just the perfect Birthday present. So I think I'll give it to you for you Birthday."

PAUSE! What I really wanted to say was this: "Well...I thought about that, but it's just the perfect BIRTHday present...cuz guess what!?!?......"

Baby is due June 19, 2012  (Which is the day after your June 18th Birthday. Your perfect Birthday present is you may be sharing the same Birthday as my baby!!! Well...at least super close Birthdays. Plus, you can come and visit me, the hubby and the baby! woop woop!!!-this goes to all you roommates!)

Yeah, that's right. Who's gonna be the cutest lady with a pregnant belly. Me!! :D

Brain Dead ...

So I use the program Publisher to make my Menu Calendar and for some reason I am having like the hardest time converting it over. IT WON'T WORK! Pregnancy pretty much makes you lose every brain cell in your body. ... SOOO on another note, I am just going to type it out and it will look kinda ghetto but yeah you will love it anyway right?
Decembers Menu Plan ( DUN DUN DUN DUN)
 Thursday December 1: Avocado Chicken Parm served over pasta
Friday December 2: Broccoli Cheddar Soup with carrots as well
Saturday December 3: * Bread Baking Day
Sunday December 4: Balsamic Brown Sugar PorkLoin ( I can find 1-3lb porkloins at a grocer near me and they are the perfect size for us however, if you can't you can buy a larger one and split it as I am using a porkloin later this month as well) Mashed Potato's , Squash
Monday December 5: BBQ chicken crescents ( I am using shredded chicken from a large batch I made in Oct.)
Tuesday December 6: Chicken Gyros, Ceasar Salad
Wednesday December 7: Roast and Veggies in crockpot ( I teach activity days on wednesdays so these almost always have to be crockpot meals as I don't get home until 830 and the husband will starve otherwise)
Thursday December 8: Cheesy Enchilada Casserole ( I am using leftover tortillas from Nov.  they stay fresh for a very long time in the fridg.)
December 9-11: Anniversary Trip NO COOKING WHOOP WHOOP
December 12: BBQ Pork Flatbread (Using previously prepared shredded pork and leftover flatbread from Gyros)
December 13: Sloppy Joes ( Using Deer meat) Sweet Potato Fries
December 14: Pressed Burritos ( Using leftover deer meat and same tortillas from Nov.) Mexi Rice
December 15: BBQ Pork Sandwhiches ( Using leftover BBQ pork from Monday and leftover buns from tuesday) Corn, Chips
December 16: Apple Bourban Porkloin ( This is the other half of the porkloin) Potato's greenbeans
December 17: Date night NO COOKING
December 18: Sunday Dinner with the parents ( Will bring a coordinating sidedish)
December 19: Turkey panini's , Sweet Potato chips
December 20-31: WILL BE IN UTAH WHOOP WHOOP NO COOKING .

** As you can see we have several events in December so I didn't have to plan nearly as many meals. Hope this is somewhat useful but let me know !
** My planned shopping trip for this month will be Saturday Dec. 3 as I have everything I need to make my first two meals. I try to plan the first few meals on food I already have available incase my shopping trip needs to be delayed until that first weekend.

Grocery Store Blues

So my husband and I ... we used to HATE grocery shopping and since I work until 7 dinner was a MAJOR problem for us! I would do a weekly meal plan and then never get around to shopping and so therefore half the stuff that week we couldn't eat and I would be so unprepared. I would get home at 7:30 and try and make the quickest easiest meal so we could maybe eat by 8:30 and we would eat and I would fall in to bed exhausted!!!!!!!!!! Not to mention we were eating tons of crappy food like Ramen, Canned Soup, and my love for cooking was completely killed because well, I wasn't actually being allowed to cook. The temptation of picking up pizza, or fast food on the way home was so incredibly high! And I must admit ! I did fall into that temptation often. We were spending TONS of money on food, CRAPPY food, and we were both so disgusted with dinner!
NOT ANYMORE!
I redesigned how I plan our meals! I plan an entire month in advance now and set a day for that months shopping. YES, that is right! I only have to go grocery shopping ONCE a month. Occasionally I have to run for a gallon of milk or some fresh produce but its a quick 5 minute stop and I only have to do that if the things I bought have gone bad!
I make an entire month of recipes. I make a list from those recipes and use recipes that I  can combine ingredants. For example I can make Bajio Chicken Salads early in the month and used leftover shredded chicken from that meal later on in the month for mexican pasta or tacos. I do a bunch of crockpot cooking so when I get home at 7 the food is already there or I look for recipes that take 30 minutes or less so when I get home I know exactly what we are having that day, I have all the stuff ready to go and BAM dinner is done by 8. PLUS  I make a bunch of freezable stuff on the weekends in my crock pot. Like shredded chicken , pork and beef so its set for that month and really its not a big deal because I put it in the crockpot and do whatever I want for the rest of the day!
For the month of November we spent a WHOPPING 100 dollars for the entire month! and that included several items that weren't even on the list like Caffeine Free Dr. Pepper !! YUM !
Best of all, all our meals are home cooked goodness, no more Ramen or canned CRAP! and super yummy. Seriously produce can be so cheap! And you can freeze it which makes it even better! Prep is essential for me! Like dicing onions ahead of time and freezing them in a bit of water so they are ready to go all you do is defrost!

Sorry I was just so excited about this that I couldn't even hide it! We are going on two months of success and I can't wait til month three. No more Grocery Blues for us